Hollywood’s Book Grinder, with an ending for James Cameron

I’m worried about you.

You know why? Because a lot of you think that AVATAR should have won the Oscar for Best Screenplay.

That’s pretty scary in an of itself, and thankfully Kathyrn Bigelow’s THE HURT LOCKER kicked AVATAR all up and down the block like a football.

Still, you think the most typical story model in literature and movies was the best story the film industry had to offer last year, which means:

Either you have no idea what a good story is, or your brain has been so pimped out, smacked up, and tenderized by typical stories and typical movies that you just bow down to the most basic entertainment…long as it looks pretty and dazzles you with special effects.

I want to get that yoke from around your neck, starting with one of the dirtiest words in popular American culture:

BOOK.

Most of the movies you pay to see come from books, in one way or another.

What’s topping the charts these days?

ALICE IN WONDERLAND, right?

Okay, I won’t insult you because we all got past the fifth grade so we know that one came from a book.

The next cash cow in the theaters? SHUTTER ISLAND.

See that ominous movie poster? The one that makes you do the oohs and ahhs?

If you look at all those annoying words at the bottom of the poster, you will see “Based on the novel by Dennis Lehane”.

Yeah, that’s the guy who busted his ass to create the story you’re flocking to see like flies to a carcass.

And the sad thing is your idea of the main character Leo played is what you saw on the screen.

In the book, the character of U.S. Marshal Teddy Daniels is considerably more layered and nuanced.

Just imagine if someone took your entire life and made a two-hour movie about it, and made the choices of what was exciting about your life and what wasn’t, and what’s exciting about you and what’s not.

Would they do you justice?

You’ve seen PRECIOUS, right?

No, you haven’t, because “PRECIOUS” is actually “PRECIOUS, Based on the novel “Push” by Sapphire.”

Director Lee Daniels went on The Daily Show with Jon Stewart, and Jon made a joke out of the title. Lee reminded Mister Stewart of the actual title of the film, which acknowledges the source material.

Sapphire’s book used the nature of language to breathe life into the character, to put the character’s voice into your head so you could “hear” it. To make your brain do some work.

To push you.

And look, lots of love to my girl Mo’Nique for winning that Oscar, but it’s not about her and she knows that.

It’s about the story she helped translate, but here’s a question.

How many of you have read the book?

Uh huh.

Okay, now that you know it’s a book, if you somehow missed it in the title and on all the movie posters…will you go out and buy it?

Probably not, because you already know the story, right?

Yeah, right.

And just so you don’t misunderstand, I’m not a film hater.

There were actually a few good ones this year, that didn’t come from books.

But you know what? They came from the reference of real life, and I don’t mean life put through a strainer so all of the boring parts could drip into the sink and leave behind the exciting stuff.

Real. Life.

THE HURT LOCKER drew on real stories of war. That’s part of the reason the story felt so real. Honest, authentic source material.

But it’s not even about that.

It’s about you.

You go through life and you want the easiest entertainment, the path of least mental resistance, the product that involves the least amount of thinking.

Your brain is like your body. If you don’t give it proper nourishment and exercise, it will go flabby and sweat easily and get tired after running one block, then conk out on you before its time.

Movies are the Big Macs of the world.

People are toiling away to provide you and the world with stories. Some of them become films and television shows, and most don’t. Some of them are badly written, but quite a number of them are well-written.

Try an experiment. Yes, it means work! Work…with…me.

Next time you hear about a movie coming out, or see a trailer for a movie that intrigues you, go to a bookstore or Amazon it and see if there’s a book out with that title.

If so, go buy the book and read it. Then see the movie and compare the two. See if you gained the reward of a deeper story and a better understanding of the characters you love or hate.

I can almost guarantee you will, because as good as the best film-based book is, the book itself is almost always better.

And just in case you’re thinking “What’s in it for me?”

Well, if you’re a parent and you’re worried about your kids growing up with bad habits and turning out to be lazy good-for-nothings, then you set a good example by reading books with them and in front of them.

Yes, reading WITH your kids.

And if you don’t have kids, think about this.

The fewer books get purchased, the further the book industry goes into the toilet, thus the fewer books Hollywood scoops up to make films out of…and then you know what we’re left with?

Boring, empty, typical regurgitated stories that desperately need special effects to cover up their lack of richness and depth.

Know what I mean?

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